'Where you invest your love, you invest your life.'
Whenever I hear this mumford & sons lyric, I can't not think about where I invest my love.
This lyric is the core to being stripped. Do me a favour and try not to think about the Christina Aguilera album from back in the day, but being stripped of what friends at college or family are so content and just with living with.
So many times, I take a step back to have a look at my life and its direction. And so many times I'm unhappy and break down. Break down in my world; cry about it for a period of time, praying, then falling into the trap that now I've addressed the problem, it's fine, done and dusted. Amongst all this, where is Change?
No change is the reason that there are so many of those times I have to look at my life and be unhappy with the same things. I know it sounds simple, but I know for a fact I'm not the only one out there who struggles with change.
We need to go back to the core. Stripped. Start again. Not just, build on top of the problems, or try and edit the problems. You can try and change it yourself I guess, change the things you do, the things that consume your time, but that has proven difficult for me. Until I surrender, I will never change.
Today I got so frustrated to the point where I couldn't even speak to my mum, cos I knew that any interaction would be me shouting, how silly. The reason I was so wound up? Because my dad has lost some of my CD cases. I hate finding CD's with half a case, or no case, or no sleeve. Pet peeve I guess. I'm pretty certain that getting upset over that was a complete waste of my time. A complete waste of my time with no positive outcome. Fortunatley for us humans, when we invest our time and love in something or somebody else, there is only ever a positive outcome.
No wonder I'm so tired all the time, all my energies go into being frustrated or upset, ha.
Blogs are brilliant for self-evaluation.
I wanna start off with just saying that i love you <3
ReplyDeleteI was deciding whether to go and read my bible or not but then Mock the Week came on and i thought i'd check here and then decided to comment on here.. i don't think God will be too impressed! But then i thought, the time i spend syaing what i'm gonna say will be blessed by our Heavenly Father anyway and He will use that time to speak to me as much as i waffle on to you.
I was talking to my mum about a similar thing the other day also. If you want change to happen, pray about it. We're in a relationship with God where things are 50:50, God doing His bit as we show how we are trying to change ourselves. Let me give you a for instance...
I know that I can be rather selfish at times. It's in my nature and after being hurt and judged several times, it's also a defence mechanism although i think that can be seen as an excuse by some. In order for me to change that, i first of all have to want to change it. Then, i have to show that in action, so show actions of me being selfLESS. God will see that, bless it and as His blessings pour onto that part of my life, they will improve cos Jesus is shining through them and i'm becoming more like Him.
As for other things Bec, God asks us to look at ourselves with sober judgement. This doesn't mean ignore your sin, nor does it mean see yourself as a perfect angel. It means look at yourself through God's eyes which is often what other people see but it's hard to see it for ourselves.
When I look at you, i see a strong woman of God, dedicated, talented, blessed, beautiful!, holy, gifted, special girl that God created. Yeah, we mess up Bec, we aren't ever gonna be perfect..
If i can give you one piece of advice it would be to not strive. In the story of the Prodigal Son, the Father didn't rush or run to his son, he stood there and his son came running to him and just sat and wept. Now, i'm not asking you to cry lol, but all God wants is us and our heart; a heart that wants to be closer to him and longs to develop into who He wants us to be. Don't set yourself challenges that God doesn't want of you- God gives you strength everyday for what HE wants you to do...
I hope you don't think I've told you off.
Btw, I'm loving your blogs, they're truely insightful :D
Love you darling, God bless
xxx